I know that I’m operating on the level of superstition, collecting sweaters like talismans in order to stave off what I already understand: Mourning cannot be circumvented, and some holes cannot be plugged.
The vacuum, in my experience, becomes filled with nuances of the missing person that you observe in others ... family members, friends, strangers. You learn not to reach for those nuances ... as soon as you try to grasp, the wisp of soul is gone. Continuing the lesson of having less attachment to things that are gone forever. When they come, merely observe and smile, appreciate the experience. These experiences are a gift to you and you alone, noone else would understand or appreciate the circumstance.